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It only rains straight down. God doesn't do windows.
— Steven Wright
"I'm with your guitar stealing your riffs."
"I'm on your laptop watching your porn."
"I am on your floor, stopping you from decorating."
"I'm in your town scaring your people."
"I'm in your tube blocking your Internet."
"I'm in your sweater stealing your warmth."
"I'm in your sink licking your bowls."
"I'm in your sink blocking your drainage."
"I'm in your room cranking out some tunes."
"I'm in your purse stealing your identity."