B.J.: What do you want to be?
Radar: A hot lover. Or even a cold one. I don't care.
B.J.: What makes you think the army could help you with that?
Radar: When my Uncle Ed came home from World War I, his mother could tell from the look in his eyes that he hadn't been a good boy in France. She cried for three days. I just know when I get home, my mother's going to look at me and chuckle for a week.